SANTA and BANTA, Jodi No.1

1…_ _…

 

EK BAAR SANTA SINGH AUR BANTA SINGH EK INTERVIEW DENAY K LIYE AYE...

PEHLAY SANTA KI BAARI THI....

INTERVIEWER: AMERICA KE PRESIDENT KA NAAM BATAYEIN?
SANTA: WAISAY TOU BADALTA REHTA HAI PER AAJ KAL BUSH HAI

INTERVIEWER: PAKISTAN KAB BANA?
SANTA: KOSHISH TO SADIYON SE JARI THI PER 1947 MEIN BAN GAYA THA

INTERVIEWER: MARS PER ABAADI HAI YA NAHI?
SANTA: SCIENTIST KAAFI ARSAY SE KOSHISH KAR RAHAY HEIN PER SAABIT NAHI KAR SAKAY

SANTA BAHAR AYA TO BANTA JEE NE US SE POOCHA K UNHON NE KIYA KIYA SAWAL KIYE AUR TUMNE KIYA KIYA JAWAB DIYE... SANTA NE BANTA JEE KO SAB JAWABAAT BATA DIYE...

AB BANTA JEE ANDER GAYE...

INTERVIEWER: SARDAR JEE APKA NAAM KIYA HAI?
BANTA: WAISAY TOU BADALTA REHTA HAI MAGAR AJ KAL BUSH HAI

INTERVIEWER (HERAN HO KAR): SARDAR JEE AAP PEDA KAB HUWAY ?
BANTA: KOSHISH TOU SADIYON SE JARI THI PER 1947 MEIN HO HI GAYA THA

INTERVIEWER (GUSSAY SE): SARDAR JEE AP PAGAL TOU NAHI HEIN?
BANTA: SCIENTIST ARSAY SE KOSHISH KAR RAHAY HEIN MAGAR SAABIT NAHI KAR SAKAY...

 

2…_ _…

EK BAAR SANTA JEE APNI BEHAN KE SATH SCOOTER PER JA RAHAY THE... RAASTAY MEIN UNKA DOST MILTA HAI AUR KEHTA HAI SANTA OYE KINNI SONI MAASHOOQ BITHYA HOYA A...

SANTA JEE GUSSE MAIN KEHTAY HEIN...OYE MAASHOOQ HOYE GI TERI MERI TAAN PEN A....

 

3…_ _…

 

SANTA SINGH WENT TO THE APPLIANCES STORE SALE AND FOUND A BARGAIN.
I WOULD LIKE TO BUY THIS SMALL TV, HE SAID TO THE SALESMAN.

''SORRY WE DONT SELL TO SARDARS, SALESMAN REPLIED

SARDAR JI HURRIED HOME REMOVED HIS TURBAN AND CHANGED HIS HAIR STYLE, AND RETURNED TO TELL THE SALESMAN,
'' I WOULD LIKE TO BUY THIS TV,
''SORRY WE DONT SELL TO SARDARS, SALESMAN REPLIED

''D**MN HE RECOGNIZED ME AGAIN, HE THOUGHT HE WENT FOR A COMPLETE DISGUISE THIS TIME,HAIRCUT AND NEW HAIR COLOUR, NEW OUTFIT, BIG SUNGLASSES, THEN WAITED A FEW DAYS BEFORE HE AGAIN APPROACHED THE SALESMAN,
''I WOULD LIKE TO BUY THIS TV,
''SORRY WE DONT SELL TO SARDARS, SALESMAN REPLIED

''FRUSTRATED, HE EXCLAIMED, ''HOW DO YOU KNOW I’M A SARDAR..?
BECAUSE THAT’S A MICROWAVE'' SALESMAN REPLIED...

 

 

4…_ _…

 

ONE DAY BANTA SINGH GOT A JOB AS A PHOTOGRAPHER AND

ALSO GOT HIS FIRST ASSIGNMENT TO TAKE PHOTOGRAPH IN A FUNERAL FUNCTION.

 

IN THE FUNERAL HE WAS FOCUSING ON THE DEADBODY'S FACE, SUDDENLY HE STARTED BEATING THE DEADBODY...

"WHAT’S GOING ON?" EVERYONE PRESENT THERE ALMOST SHOUTED
BANTA REPLIED ''AGAIN AND AGAIN I’M TELLING HIM TO SMILE BUT HE IS NOT SMILING''

 

 

5…_ _…

 

SANTA SINGH TOLD HIS SERVANT: GO AND WATER THE PLANTS
SERVANT: BUT ITS RAINING OUTSIDE
SANTA: SO WHAT, TAKE AN UMBRELLA AND GO...

 

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Ash weds Abhi, but has broken a millions heart :(

The venue of the marriage was Amitabh Bachchan’s home Prateeksha in suburban Juhu, which was thronged by invitees from Bollywood to industrial world and politicians, as thousands of fans waited outside for a glimpse of the newly-wed couple.

Abhishek Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai became man and wife as their new innings in life began with the solemnisation of the high profile “wedding of the year” in Mumbai on Friday.

The couple tied the nuptial knot in a North Indian style ceremony full of pomp and extravaganza, but held in an extremely private manner. According to those who attended the ceremony, priests from Varanasi conducted the rituals. It was the auspicious day of Akshaya Tritiya when Abhi and Ash tied the knot, climaxing three days of festivities. The
main ceremony was short and simple. The wedding function was held at a huge air-conditioned pandal in a garden adjoining Prateeksha. Red and pink flowers, encircled by gold and green curtains covered the tent. The bungalow itself was decorated in South Indian fashion with banana stems and fruits.



Among the VVIPs who attended the wedding were Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister Mulayam Singh Yadav, Samajwadi Party General Secretary Amar Singh, industrialists Anil Ambani, Subrato Roy of the Sahara group, actors Ajay Devgan, Kajol, Sanjay Dutt, Dimple Kapadia, Anupam Kher, Ritesh Deshmukh, Sonali Bendre, Preity Zinta and cricketer Sachin Tendulkar. Shiv Sena executive president Uddhav Thackeray, directors Ram Gopal Varma, J P Dutta, Romesh Sharma and Ashotosh Gowarikar too were there. So were Shammi Kapoor as well as Danny Denzongpa and A R Rehman.



On the otherhand as a gift for the beautiful couple a painting by Husain, depicting mega cine stars Abhishek and Aishwarya seated on the traditional wedding horse, and Bollywood hunk Salman Khan, a former boyfriend of Ash, as a heart-broken man with a stick in one hand and an empty bowl in the other, it's a sure recipe for a storm in a teacup. Especially for the media! And the storm is blowing. Husain has described Salman as one 'symbolising the millions of heart-broken Indians'.

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